Suicide Notes

 

07 January 2021

18:42

I would say it was quite a read. What I loved most was how the story is told. It makes me think of this person who is going through all these things step by step. Day after day and it has this element of realism that makes me think it is all happening to someone for real. 

 

It’s the first time reading a novel that deals with gayness and I really must say, I love how the whole thing is expressed. I kinda understand these people. What they go through, the stigma and all the biasness because of it. They are just like us. I only wonder why one becomes gay. What exactly happens. I don’t understand how a man would fall in love with another man and actually get to marry this other man and not a woman and also the same for women. Two girls fall in love and they marry. How do they have kids and procreate. It doesn’t make any sense for goodness sake. It all feels wrong in my opinion. But with how the world is like right now, am forced to accept it as truth because somehow it's happening. And it's something that I just wonder about. It's weird. And I wish it was not there.  But of course, that is like wishing there was no love at all huh. Or am I wrong?

 

Here are some sentences I liked.

It’s raining and the only thing I can see out the window is part of the forest. Since its winter, though, it looks less like a forest and more like a bunch of skeletons holding their hands up to the sky. The rain is running down the glass, making it look like the skeletons are under water. Drowning. Although if they are skeletons, wouldn’t they already be dead? So maybe they are swimming.

...or what will happen when the polar ice cap melts? Did you know all the polar bears are drowning because they have nothing to sit on?

...once you realise there is nothing to be afraid of when you die, there is nothing else to worry about.

...if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Just one. It can be anything-a physical thing you wish you had or didn’t have, a talent you would like to have, anything. But you only get one. -this one got my attention because it means you just don’t appreciate yourself as much. Why change something about you? Am sure you have reasons. I hope they are good reasons and I hope it's something that is changeable. In a good way. I think it's good when we want to change for the better. Even physically. Just watch your reasons. Let them be right.